Comic Archive

OIB-A271: Eh, (using robot voice) scanning perimeter… checking for intruders… Status OK!
Alana: You are not fooling me, robot. I have been keeping an eye on you. Your capabilities are impossibly advanced for your hardware.
OIB-A271: Damn, busted.

Heidi has also arrived.
Heidi: Oh… Alana, you have returned to the office?
Alana: Yes Heidi, I forgot to take my laptop home. I think you have some explaining to do regarding this “dog.” Something about it makes no sense.

Heidi: Well, I guess there is no point in trying to keep this secret. The best explanation we have so far, is that this OIBA is possessed.
Alana: What? That is like… an anti-explanation, now I am even more confused! Possessed by what?

Heidi: The fermented remains of old Macroshaft products.
Alana: OK, now I think my head is just about to explode.

Alana: So, both the mutant Clippy, as well as this OIBA's personality originated from some dark goop stored in ‘Deletium’ containers? I do not believe in magic, there must be a rational explanation. Do you still have those containers?
Heidi: Yes.

Alana and Heidi look at the remains of the Deletium containers.
Heidi: The goop is gone, but there are still remnants of crushed Macroshaft installer disks.
Alana: I see both contain parts of the same ‘MS Office’ release, the first one to feature Clippy.
OIB-A271: You have got to be kidding me! I also contain bits of Clippy?

Heidi: Seems like it, OIB-A271. But, you do originate for the most from Midtown Madness.
OIB-A271: The madness part does sound about right!
Alana: I have to go now, tomorrow we will investigate furter. Something I've heard in the news gives me a certain suspicion…

Setting: meeting room, OIB-A271 is standing in the middle on a table
Alana: I understand that you wanted to keep this hidden due to the sheer absurdity of a robot becoming sentient through an infusion with putrid products from an often mocked software company, but I would like to stay informed about everything that happens in this company…

Alana: … even when it might raise questions about your sanity. That being said, there must be a sane explanation. So, you've been named ‘OIB-A271.’ Do you have any memories from before your “rebirth?”
OIB-A271: Not much. I do remember a weird guy…
Max: What weird guy?

OIB-A271: These may be memories from my Clippy origins. He believed he could make the office assistant self-aware.
Steve: Well, that obviously never happened. Unless they confused the concepts self-aware and annoying…
Alana: Now this is where that news article comes into play…

Alana: I have been scanning the media for news about Quantuple. Very little to be found, nobody explains what really happened, but one geeky news site had some good background. The guy actually worked for Macroshaft at the end of last century, doing A.I. research, and was part of the team responsible for the office assistant.

Zhang: No way, are you implying that Clippy is one of his creations?
Max: And our Deletium adventure was caused by this same guy?
Alana: There is no proof, but combined with OIB-A271's memories, it is the only explanation that does not sound totally ridiculous.

Max: More like Occam's axe than Occam's razor… it raises more questions than it answers. Why did he leave MS?
Alana: Nobody took him seriously or believed in his supposedly self-conscious constructs.
Max: Well, that does sound familiar…